Choosing a spouse in Islamic marriage! Religious matters to be considered in the marriage meeting

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People who want to save their world and the hereafter should be very careful in choosing a spouse with whom they will be companions for a lifetime. Happiness can be achieved both in this world and in the hereafter with a righteous spouse with whom they will be prepared for the hereafter. Here are the points that the parties should pay attention to in terms of religion in the marriage meeting! Here are the things to consider at the first meeting for marriage…

Marriage in daily life is a situation that people find themselves or perform in an arranged manner. There are some important criteria that people who decide to marry in line with the features they see and like in each other or for different reasons should pay attention. In Islam, this situation is not inconvenient for people to meet with the consent of their families with the intention of getting married and to explain their thoughts about marriage to each other. Our beloved Prophet (SAV) advised his ummah to live a marriage based on religion and said in a hadith: “Whoever gets married will have completed half of the faith; Let him fear Allah about the remaining half!” (Heysemi, IV, 252) On the other hand, in the verse about marriage “It is his (his existence and power) that he created spouses for you so that you could find peace with them and that he created love and mercy between you. is one of the proofs. Surely in this there are signs for a people who reflect.” (Greek, 30/21). Marriage life, which keeps a person from sins and keeps away from looking at haram, will also affect our hereafter, so one should be careful in choosing a spouse. So much so that our Prophet (SAV) highlights the following 4 characteristics to be sought when a woman is about to get married; His piety, beauty, lineage and property.


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It is important for a happy and peaceful family to have certain qualities in the people they consider as spouse candidates. So, what characteristics should spouse candidates pay attention to before marriage? Here is the rule before marriage ‘5T’

1- T esbit

You should gather the necessary information about the person you are considering as a spouse candidate and determine whether it is suitable for you and your family.

2- T preference

If you believe that you can spend a lifetime with the person you see fit for marriage, you should not prolong the work.

3- T action

You should surrender by taking the necessary precautions for a happy and healthy marriage.

4- T surrender

After knowing your responsibilities and duties, you should surrender and leave the judgment to Allah. Knowing that what happens to you or what is to come is written in your destiny, you should look to see if your spouse represents you.

5- T emsil

Knowing that you will become a wife soon, you should pay attention to your actions and act accordingly. You must show your sweet tongue and keep your patience.

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Persons acting as intermediaries for marriage should consist of family elders.

It is not right to attempt a marriage that will take you out of the halal circle by meeting in the social media environment.

If the marriage negotiations will result in a negative situation, the situation should be explained to the other party frankly.

Today, while the man is expected to be older than the woman’s age for marriage, there is no such requirement in Islam. It is recommended for spouse candidates at least 2-3 years old, and at most 9-10 years old.

If any of the people has gone through a previous marriage or engagement period, this must be reported to the other party.

If possible, the parties should have at least one of their elders present at the place where they will meet.

– It is important to act in accordance with manners and morals during the interview.

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